A Word About the Holodeck

Imagine if you will a room where your every fantasy can be lived our. Imagine such a room available to a bunch of horny men and women stuck in a spaceship light years from home. What would they do with this incredible phenomenon? Inhabit the novels of Arthur Conan Doyle? Live episodes taken from the works of Alexandre Dumas? Create a mock nineteenth century Irish village? Enact a 1930’s movie serial called Captain Proton?

Right.

If a holodeck existed, it would be a good idea to hose it down with a strong disinfectant after every use…

The Doctors- Part 1

This installment is dedicated to selecting just who I would want to be my doctor if I was traveling through the galaxy in a starship.

Leonard McCoy: The redoubtable Bones could creditably compete in a contest for Most Annoying Character on a Video Science Fiction Presentation.* He would not win such a contest only because he’d face such formidable competition as Wesley Crusher and Jar-Jar Binks. Although he did deliver a few enjoyable lines (Kirk: “I want to know what killed these tribbles;” McCoy: “I don’t know what keeps them alive yet.”), in general, DeForest Kelley’s emotional range extended from indignation all the way to exasperation. If I had to ship out with Bones as the physician, I’d head for an escape pod at the earliest opportunity.

Katherine Pulaski: Diana Muldaur played this character much in the McCoy tradition: stubborn, uncooperative, and self-righteous, though at a reduced emotional pitch. That she does not linger upon the palate like the first taste of a bottle of wine gone bad on the shelf is because she lasted only one season of TNG.

Beverly Crusher: This character, played by Gates McFadden, is in a least one way the most doctorly of all: despite her flaming red hair, she is as colorless as a lab coat. Though she rarely got in the way, she rarely added a great deal. If she deserves opprobrium for anything, it is for bearing the abomination known as Wesley Crusher.

__________________________________________________
* In a future post, I hope to explore the issue of who is the most irritating recurring character in the Star Trek universe.

Star Trek- The Return

A personal crisis can turn a person’s life in a wholly new direction. A lightning storm caused Martin Luther to leave law school and become a monk. Siddhartha Gautama started on the path to becoming the Buddha because of a chance encounter with an old man on the road. A conflict with his father and the bishop in the square in Assisi propelled Francesco Bernadone to sainthood. My personal crisis, my divorce in 2006, led me to the arms of one that I have always loved, Star Trek and its various spinoffs.*

My divorce sparked a mild midlife crisis. There were no sports cars, hair weaves, or women twenty years my junior.** There were, however, the purchases of an elliptical trainer and a flat screen TV. I put the elliptical trainer in front of the TV, sensing that there might be a certain synergy. Then I began to think about what I would be watching.

As a child I lived in the heyday of the syndication Star Trek, the original series. During one glorious year I could watch eleven episodes a week, and I did. I never lost my love of it. But in 1985 I moved to St. Croix in the United States Virgin Islands, and except for a brief period none of the Star Trek spinoffs of the 90’s were available on local television. This changed when a local UPN affiliate started up in time for the second season of Star Trek: Enterprise (“Enterprise”). I religiously watched seasons two and three. What might be called the terminal phase of my marriage occurred during season four, and so I did not follow the series as closely. But when I was on my own and in possession of the aforesaid elliptical trainer and flat screen TV, my mind returned to the twenty second century and beyond…

I purchased the first Three season of Star Trek: The Next Generation (“TNG”) from Amazon.com and started to watch. Then things really picked up. The Sci Fi Channel started to run four episodes of Enterprise every Monday. My cable provider added The Spike Channel, which showed episodes of TNG, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine (“DS9”), and Star Trek: Voyager (“Voyager”). I had a TiVo box and I’d joined Netflix. I was off to the races.

Now I am in the process making sure I’ve seen every episode of every series. I’ve completed Star Trek, Enterprise, and Voyager, and am in the final season of DS9 and the fourth season of TNG. I’m turning my daughters into Trekkies. And I’ve started this blog, to record my random and probably often incoherent musings on this love of my youth, rediscovered in my middle age.*** I hope you enjoy it.

_____________________________________________
* To the extent this comparison seems hyperbolic, see the distinction between “Man” and “Guy,” in The Complete Guide to Guys, by Barry, Dave.

** Alas!
*** Assuming that I live to be 96.